Why Give Gifts?

                                            painting by Carl Larsson - Christmas Morning (1894)

If I had the time (and who knows - perhaps someday!), I could give you at least 12 good reasons for giving gifts at Christmas, or perhaps (almost as easily) 40 reasons to go with the 40 days of the whole Christmas season until the Presentation, or honestly (for what do we have, if not the Truth?) I would enjoy coming up with a reason for each day of Advent, and then for all the days of Christmas and Epiphany - maybe that will be my next book!

Meanwhile, as if I were Chesterton, I might entitle this post, "In Defense of Gifts at Christmas," but alas, like you, my time is limited, and so I must limit my words, a fitting restraint also imposed by the quote from St. John of the Cross that surprisingly gives me my best reason for giving gifts. It has to do with words, and in fact, The Word, and it does tend to encourage fewer of them on my part.

First, though, a petition to you, dear reader:

Please never be afraid of our dear holy Father St. John of the Cross!

He was not quite four feet eleven inches tall, and St. Therese would admire that - she loved littleness in all things! But his heart was far from little. He may sometimes seem like the Grinch, what with his Spanish Nada, nada, nada and his Dark Nights, but the only way he resembles the Grinch is that despite his diminutive stature, St. John's heart was if anything, two sizes too large! He is such a lover - let his poetry be an indication of that! - and he was a very gentle confessor and spiritual director. I'm sure if he ever had the chance to celebrate Christmas with the Whos in Whoville, he'd be the one carving the roast beast, and he'd certainly be the one singing with the greatest joy!

I recently re-watched the classic cartoon Grinch movie, but with even more consolation I recently re-read, from no less an expert and sage than Bishop Guy Gaucher (God rest his soul), the wisdom I had first heard decades ago:

It has been the Carmelite tradition to advise newcomers to St. John of the Cross (which could be all of us!) to ALWAYS begin with the end. That is, start reading his works with The Spiritual Canticle and The Living Flame of Love. This is what St. Therese did, she whom Blessed Marie-Eugene of the Child Jesus lauded as the only one to perfectly understand St. John of the Cross! 

And even better might be the good counsel we received, my husband and I, at the start of our Carmelite days in the early 1990's, from a wise friar from Holy Hill, a director after St. John's own heart, who told us to begin with our holy father St. John's poetry. His commentaries (his famous books such as The Dark Night of the Soul) are "the gloss" on his poems. He wrote them when asked to explain his poetry, but he is clear and says straight out that these are mystical poems and so do not have a word for word commentary (like you might find for Aristotle, for instance) but are best understood by the Holy Spirit explaining them to us without words or in His own words. Thus we should not be bound by the St. John's commentaries (his long and excellent books) but begin and end with the poetry itself, so that God might speak His Word to our soul more directly.

So what about Christmas presents?

Forgive me - I'm more like my holy mom Teresa with her 3 volumes of Collected Works plus 2 more volumes for her letters, than like my holy dad John with his 1 volume including the very few surviving letters (but oh, how good they are, those letters of his!) . . . Today, however, I will seek to imitate my holy father by giving only One Answer to that perennial Christmas-time question, "Why Give Gifts?" - only one answer, but it's a good one! Here goes:

"The Father spoke one Word, which was His Son, and this Word He speaks always in eternal silence, and in silence must it be heard by the soul."  - St. John of the Cross (Sayings of Light and Love, #100)

This is the truth, and yet our dear Father St. John of the Cross tells us many things in many words (note that this was the one hundredth saying of Light and Love!) because although he knows only God can finally (and firstly) speak this Word to us, he (St. John) cannot help himself from repeating this Word!

Similarly, God has given us one Gift, which was His Son, and this gift He gives always in eternal delight, and in delight must it be received by the soul. 

And yet I, like my holy Father St. John, knowing this truth, yet still must give! I give many gifts because although I know Jesus is God's one true Gift, still I cannot help myself from sharing this delight.

I imagine you too want more than anything (well maybe more than anything except a nap!) to bring the delight of Jesus to your family and friends, your home and the world . . . if only you could. And gifts, however small or silly, thoughtful or last minute, are one means we can use.

And so, dear reader on your way to Christmas, whether you are "all finished" or in the midst of your material preparations, I offer you a closing prayer (adapted from a dear friend who does things prayerfully and beautifully) . .  May Our Blessed Mother, the true Mother of our Brother baby Jesus, guide us to delighting the Father by finding our delight on Christmas day in the one Gift of His Son, and in all the other gifts He can't seem to keep Himself from giving too!

Dear Mary, Our Lady of Bethlehem, to you I entrust my Christmas gift giving. You are Our Lady of Joyful Surprises and the Cause of our Joy. Grant that all the gifts we exchange this year bring the Joy and delight of the Father, that is His Beloved Son, into our homes. May the poor and humble gifts we exchange bring us joy from the True Joy you held in your arms and nursed at your breast, may they bring us peace from the True Peace the angels announced to the shepherds, and light from the True Light that guided the Magi to behold their King.

Especially, dear Mother Mary, we beg that on Christmas we may receive Holy Communion and embrace little  Jesus as you and St. Joseph did, giving Him warmth and smiles, caresses and our hearts, and receiving in Him the one Gift of the Father, that we may bring Him to all we meet, all we love, all who long for Him whether they know it or not.

We ask this in Jesus' Holy and adorable name!

St. Nicholas, pray for us!
Saints Balthasar, Melchior, and Gaspar, pray for us you wise men who met Wisdom!
St. Frances Xavier Cabrini, whose last act was wrapping Christmas gifts for the poor Italian children who would otherwise have gone without presents, pray for us!

And dear little Saint Therese and our brother Marcel Van, you who both experienced Christmas conversions and miracles, ask God to do in us in a moment what we haven't been able to do for ourselves in years, then teach us to turn suffering into joy, to offer a heavenly smile when the gifts aren't quite right or our feelings are hurt, and to delight in the kiss of baby Jesus on Christmas!

Draw me; we will run!