"Most of all I imitate the conduct of Magdalene; her astonishing or rather her loving audacity which charms the Heart of Jesus also attracts my own. Yes, I feel it; even though I had on my conscience all the sins that can be committed, I would go, my heart broken with sorrow, and throw myself into Jesus' arms, for I know how much He loves the prodigal child who returns to Him." --our sister St. Therese, Story of a Soul 

"If Magdalene at the time when she was listening to Me had written down what I was saying to her, what words of love would have been shown to the world. My child, it is for this that I have said to your holy sister: 'It is not all at once that all My love reveals itself, but little by little.'" --Jesus speaking with our little brother, Marcel Van, Conversations (86)

"My dear child, your role is to be the apostle of My love. For that you must not be happy simply to hear My words but you must also write them down for the good of souls." --Jesus to Marcel (and me)

Just this morning, on this glorious feast of St. Mary Magdalene, I found myself complaining to Jesus that I had been mission-less lately. There is nothing more likely to induce a case of ennui, I find, than missionlessness. Ennui is a great French word similar to (in my use of it, anyhow) degout. The only problem is that degout is French too! We can see, I think, why Jesus loves France so much (as comes out in Marcel's Conversations quite often) -  it has all the best words! 

Suffice it to say that ennui is the opposite of cheerful busyness, and degout is translated as disgust. I suppose the former (ennui) is the state of a soul who has lived long and partied hard without discovering the meaning of life (JESUS!) whereas the second state (degout) is that of the soul who has known very well life's meaning, but then keeps tending to forget it! And so one feels frustrated - with oneself, most of all, but with one's state (and feelings) as well.

But the best reason for knowing these words is not to be able to minutely describe their meanings, but rather so we know what we want to avoid! And if, like with quicksand when we happen to be walking through a jungle in an old movie (or something worse than quicksand in The Princess Bride), we come upon it unawares and find ourselves slipping down into it (if not sucked in almost instantaneously), well let's use all our little energy to reach toward that overhanging branch or at least cry out to our angels and Jesus for help!

Impossible though it seems, it's amazing how quickly - much more quickly than disaster - good things can happen. Take this morning, for instance. Here I was, finally acknowledging the ennui and degout into which I've been sinking lately, and crying out, "Wait! You forgot me! I'm feeling missionless!" when suddenly several missions just fell from the sky into my upreaching hand. No, not my u-preaching hand! My up-reaching hand!

Missions have wings, and so I was lifted out of my ennui and degout as fast as you can say, "Login" (that's Log In, not a shortened version of Logging, which goes on much farther north than my place here on the West Coast of the U.S.), or in other words just exactly as quickly as I started writing this post. Thank Heaven!

I knew I needed to think about Mary Magdalene today, it being her glorious feast, and I knew there was a passage where Jesus talks about her to Marcel in their Conversations. Talk about an overhanging branch! I need only grab onto it - and my angel knows by now to hold it constantly within reach no matter how short my arm is extending above the quicksand - to feel the salvation that Jesus has won for us long ago. (Not to harp on the subject, but if you don't yet have a copy of Convos, they are easily and quickly available HERE, in case you, too, want a ready way out of ennui and degout.)

Well, joy and rapture! Here is Jesus telling Marcel that it is just as we suspected. When He spoke to Magdalene, He had plenty to tell her, and it was just as consoling and uplifting as anything we might imagine, and more! Jesus uses this truth (of His words of love to MM, but that they were not written down by her) to explain to Marcel why his own words - or rather the words Jesus dictates to him, alongside his own words - are of crucial importance. Our Lord, God's "one Word," as St. John of the Cross likes to remind us, has much to say that He can only say little by little, bit by bit, for our minds and hearts are too small to receive His Love all at once.

Enter Marcel, with his book of Conversations. And enter our little blog, inspired by Marcel's book. For lo and behold, as often as I open our little brother's pages, I'm filled with a desire to share Jesus' and Mary's words  (and Therese's and Marcel's) with the whole world!

This morning I also remembered that our sister Therese has not only great love for Magdalene, but great words on her at the end of Story of a Soul (in certain editions these words are more in the middle, but in all editions, they shine out like the beacon leading us to shore).

Looking up Therese's passage to quote for you, what a delight to find that the Little Flower whom we can't help but imitate, since we are such very tiny flowers too, is herself imitating the quintessential lover of Jesus (after His and our Mother Mary), that second Mary whose second life was spent in adoration of Him who pulled her out of her own ennui and degout. What love fills the Gospel and the universe! And how important these feasts are for reminding us of our missions!

My mission is to write, but it only finds its fulfillment by your reading and learning of your mission. Do you know (or remember) what that mission is?

It is, in a word, to love. Or better yet, to let yourself be loved.

That's it.
Quite a tall order for a new day which you may have already filled with plans for all sorts of activities and passivities, work and play, not to mention eating, drinking, and sleeping!

Happily, to let yourself be loved is like drinking cool, fresh water when you're parched, or (at other times) like finding that you do have room for dessert - it will go into the interstices that remain despite the nourishing meal you've been blessed with already!

Whether you find your day full or empty (and even when our days are full of activity, we can be running on empty, while on other rarer days of sweet retreat, we're being filled to the brim despite appearances of emptiness), I'm glad you've found yourself here. Let's thank Jesus for loving us and ask Him to convert us like He converted Magdalene. Can you imagine? Just a look from Him and she gave up everything!

I've learned from reading Marcel that Jesus most likely doesn't ask us to give up much more than our sadness, our ennui, our degout. Can we do that for Him today? Certainly not without His divine assistance!!!

Dear Jesus, please reveal to us Your infinite tenderness and compassion, so that wherever You take us today, we will not find ourselves alone. Let Magdalene teach us to be bold with You! Send Marcel as an angelic apostle to show us how to open our hearts to You as Magdalene did and Therese did in imitation of her. Give us loving audacity which turns to You in every need, every joy and sorrow, and inspires us to commend all those we love to Your care - with every confidence that You are caring for them too!

Draw me, darling Jesus; we will run!

I haven't much time because it turns out that Marcel's feast in Vietnam started more than 14 hours ago, and in France, more than 9 hours ago, and in England, more than 8 hours ago.

This means that we here in the Americas are quite behind, as we've been this whole novena. But in the tradition of Americans doing things big - I like to think we're a sort of international Costco, doing everything too big but with great prices - let's not worry about being late to the party!

And while we're at it, in the tradition of Marcel's own Conversations, let's not worry about anything, any more, ever!

Slow learner that I am, I've been worrying just a titch lately about how I would write this post. My time has not been my own, so I wondered if I could steal some from sleep. Lo and behold, my angel thought that was a great idea, and here I am! It isn't too early elsewhere, but here it is nice and quiet and I have a few moments to kick off our celebration of our name-day feast. Hooray, and thank you dear angels!

Along with worrying about when I would write today, I was also slightly concerned about what I would write today. Silly me! I should have remembered (but being Miss Marcel, I naturally forgot) that all I need ever do is open up our brother's book and I will find more than enough material for a thousand blog posts! And so, with a prayer to our angels and Padre Pio's, let's see what Marcel and Jesus have for us on this glorious day.

Oh, but first let's finish our novena by saying the prayer Les Amis de Van and Jack Keogan shared with us. Not only is it a beautiful prayer, but it was dictated to Marcel by Jesus Himself! Feel free to add your own country to our request for graces for France, and let's borrow our sister Therese's confidence that Jesus will answer beyond our wildest dreams:

Lord Jesus, have compassion on France.
Graciously hold it tightly in Your love
and show it much tenderness.
So ordain things that, full of love for You,
it contributes to make You loved in all the nations on earth.
O Love of Jesus, we now promise to remain always faithful to You
and to work with a heart on fire
to spread Your reign throughout the universe.
We ask all this through the intercession of our little brother Marcel Van, and in Your holy name, dear Jesus. Amen.

And now, Lord, send Your Holy Spirit to guide us to the passage You want to use to rejoice our hearts on this day of Marcel's entry into Your Heart!

*   *   *

Oh that Jesus! He understands us completely, and even when He tries to hide, He lets Himself be found! And so, having flipped among the beloved pages of our brother's book, here is what I find our Spouse has to say to us on this marvelous anniversary:

From Conversations (237), the words of Jesus to our souls right now:

You seem to be very tired. That's enough, go and rest; I do not wish you to tire yourself by writing [or reading]. You please me just as much by taking a rest . . . I love you very much. I do not cease giving you kisses and embracing you in my arms. I look at you all the time and I smile on you and I am always pleased with you. So, therefore, because of the single fact that you always recognize your weakness, you receive from me perpetual support. That is enough. You are very tired, very tired. I am giving you a kiss and I hold my lips close to your cheek for all eternity.

*   *   *

Taking our adorable Lord at His word, I am going to rest now. But I will take my rest with great joy and peace, which I wish to you in abundance too, today and forever! And a little prayer before we go to celebrate, each in our own way (and mine with a pillow!) -

Draw me, we will run!

p.s. Since Marcel is the second St. Therese, the shower of roses is a big part of his mission from Heaven too! I'm asking him now to shower his and our sisters' roses upon you and your loved ones in honor of all the graces Jesus has showered upon them both in their lifetimes in exile and in their glorification. Our sweet brother, so inclined to us already, won't be able to resist such a clever prayer, so expect special graces (in the form of roses, but no doubt in many other forms as well!) which are on their way!

I received a delightful email last week. In more than timely fashion, Jack Keogan (our benefactor who translated Marcel into English) had sent to us in the U.S.A. the good news that he in England had received from Les Amis de Van in France that the annual novena to Therese's little brother and ours, Marcel Van, was about to begin, in preparation for his little feast, July 10. 

Did you note the unremitting and irretrievable past tense in that long sentence?

And if you are a math whiz, did you note too that as today is July 5 - as  I write - we may be a bit shy of 9 days counting to July 10? 

So what shall we address first?

We could begin with the explanation of why five days is somehow miraculously enough for a novena (i.e. a 9 day prayer). Or we could start with Jack's email.

Since I haven't quite solved that numerical riddle, let's go to Jack's email before we do anything else.

Jack wrote:

Les Amis de Van are organising a novena with Marcel Van commemorating the death of Brother Marcel on July 10th 1959.
It is prompted by concern for the spiritual needs of France during these troublesome times.
Our Lord did, of course, ask Marcel to pray for France, the country for which he had a particular affection.
The Friends of Van are asking us to join them in this novena, to which we could add prayers, through the intercession of Van, for our own countries whilst at the same time heeding Our Lord's request to Van that he pray a great deal for France.
Here is the prayer dictated to Van on 14 November 1945.


Lord Jesus, have compassion on France.
Graciously hold it tightly in your love
and show it much tenderness.
So ordain things that, full of love for you,
it contributes to make you loved in all the nations on earth.
O Love of Jesus, we now promise to remain always faithful to you
and to work with a heart on fire
to spread your reign throughout the universe. Amen.


We should offer this prayer through the intercession of Brother Marcel.
And we could offer a little postscript asking Our Lord to remember the needs of our own country, whatever it may be, during this time of pandemic.
The novena begins on July 1st until July 9th.
Thank you and keep your distance!
Jack.
+   +   +

First off, let me mention that I'm fairly certain Jack's sign-off of "Thank you and keep your distance!" is what we in America call "that dry British sense of humor" which we enjoy so very much!

Jack, you're funny, just like your brother Marcel! But no worries, whether we like it or not (and speaking for myself, I don't, but God's holy will be adored and glorified in this as in everything), we are forced to stay many thousands of miles away from you across the pond. Alas, but be forewarned: I, at least, retain the hope of sitting quite near you on Mary's lap in Heaven! And let's not forget the goal: to crowd her capacious lap with so many Marcel-ites that Marcel himself and Little Jesus almost fall off!

But to get back to that amazing novena prayer taught to Marcel and us by none other than the Sweet Spouse of our souls (and Les Amis and Jack), let's look at it again:

Lord Jesus, have compassion on France.
Graciously hold it tightly in your love
and show it much tenderness.
So ordain things that, full of love for you,
it contributes to make you loved in all the nations on earth.
O Love of Jesus, we now promise to remain always faithful to you
and to work with a heart on fire
to spread your reign throughout the universe. Amen.


Are you struck, as I am, by the promise to work for Jesus "with a heart on fire"? That's the name of Bishop Barron's ministry! And the goal of our consecration to Merciful Love too! But we haven't yet heeded Jack's suggestion of adding our own country to the prayer, nor his advice to ask through the intercession of Marcel. How about this:

Lord Jesus, have compassion on France, and the U.S.A. and Britain too.
Graciously hold them tightly in your love
and show them much tenderness.
So ordain things that, full of love for you,
our beloved countries contribute to make you loved in all the nations on earth.
O Love of Jesus, we now promise to remain always faithful to you
and to work with a heart on fire
to spread your reign throughout the universe.

We ask these favors through the intercession of our little brother and sister, Marcel and Therese.
Amen.

I think that's pretty good, don't you? 
And guess what? 
The angels have solved our conundrum, as I knew they would . . .
We've just read-said our novena prayer 3 times, which means we have caught up! We'll want to pray it once more at the close of our post to properly open the July 5th day, but then we have 4 days (3 past, 1 today) covered all in a jiffy and we have left in our novena just the right amount of days:

July 6 (5th day)
July 7 (6th day)
July 8 (7th day)
July 9 (8th day)
and 
July 10 (9th day), when Marcel made it out of exile at last, and into Jesus' arms once and for all! Hooray Marcel! Hooray Jesus! Long live France and every nation of the world until the new Heaven and new earth replace this worn out planet and we get to receive Jesus' kisses face to Face!

The really funny thing is that I could have sworn (which I shouldn't, but rather, as Jesus taught us. just say yay or nay), that is, I could have affirmed with all my heart, yayly, that Jack said something like, "Start the novena whenever you like!" but reading more carefully I see what he actually wrote was: "The Novena begins on July 1st until July 9th."

Oops!

But then again, I do love a novena that procrastinates and insists on ending right on the feast itself. Otherwise I risk feasting so much that I forget to pray on The Big Day, hence I'm glad we're praying just a little behind Les Amis de Van. Lead the way, dear French friends! We will follow in somewhat disorganized but quite cheerful procession!

The other think I love about a novena is when the prayer stays the same, but each day there might be something good to ponder, so let's get to the good stuff and listen to Marcel himself, or better yet Jesus Himself, as I find them today in Conversations.

Especially because do you know what I discovered recently?
The whole world has not yet heeded my brilliant insistence that each one quickly get a copy or two of Marcel's Conversations (with Jesus, Mary, and St. Therese)!

Which somewhat thrills me - the refusal of the world to Do the Right Thing - because although some might conclude from this that my work is in vain (my only real purpose being to get everyone reading his or her own copy so that I might stop writing and immerse myself in mine), I'm an inveterate bright-side kind of gal, and so, contrariwise, I conclude with the marvelous fact that my work remains important, nay, ESSENTIAL, for the common good!

In other words, if I don't keep touting and quoting from Conversations, how will the disobedient and wandering masses (as in lots of people, not the Holy Sacrifice) ever come to their senses, see the light, and procure their much needed copies of our little brother's masterpiece?

I don't know. 
I mean I don't know how they will ever, unless I keep writing and quoting. And besides, St. Thomas has this great bit about how the best life is contemplative but bursting into action because what kind of lout would or could keep to himself the fruits of his contemplation?

Exactly! The kind of lout that I am just can't, no way, keep from singing out to everyone what I find Truth telling us in this adorable book through the adorable mouth of Marcel. And why shouldn't the book and the mouth of our brother be adorable? Little Marcel Van has been kissed by the Truly and Originally Adorable mouth (and words) of The Word made Flesh, our Brother and Best Friend, none other than Jesus Our True Love!

But enough beating around the bush. How about I do some quoting? No reason to simply go on my testimony. I'm going to put you in the way of having some testimony of your own, whether you have and read your copy of this book or not. Here goes, then. Here is what Marcel and Jesus said today that tugged at my heart and made everything easier. From Conversations (226), 31 December 1945:

Marcel (and me): Little Jesus, I understand absolutely nothing.

Jesus: Marcel, who is obliging you to understand? Ignorant as you are, how would you be able to understand? If you have not yet understood what it is to lack poverty and to renounce yourself, you will understand even less what I have just said. . . Besides, I have not said these words for you, but really for souls who are afraid of me. Since you are not afraid of me, it is not necessary that you understand. Since you already love me, what would you be afraid of? Till the day you die you will only love me; consequently, you have no reason to be afraid. Marcel, how I love you. I would wish to hold you close to me always and cover you with kisses, and this desire will remain unchangeable for eternity. Yes, Marcel, my little friend, I will love you. I will give you kisses, I will hold you close to my breast, and you will be filled with delights. Then all that you wish for, I will gladly grant you . . . Marcel, may your love melt entirely into mine and then you will possess exclusively all love.

*    *    *

So which are we? Are we the souls who are afraid of Jesus, or the souls who love Him? And what if we do both (love and fear Him)?

Remember first that Jesus understands our lack of understanding and doesn't scold us for it. And then let me quote for you some more of my favorite words in Convos, favorite because they set the stage for all the words that follow.

The question at stake is: For whom are these words meant? Are they meant for us as well as for Marcel?

Here is the answer Truth (Who only speaks truly) gave to Marcel on 4 November 1945:

Jesus: . . . All the words that I have spoken to you from the beginning until the last one I speak to you in the future - know that it is not to you alone that I am speaking, but to all souls. You see by this that I communicate with all of them. And if, like you, they are sincere in their relationship with me, then I am speaking also to them. It is not necessary that you understand this. Do not be afraid, therefore, if later somebody says that I spoke only to you . . .  

*   *   *

Which brings me to the quote I found two days ago, then lost, then found again this morning. Here is why I love Marcel and why I'm confident that even if my words reach only one soul with his words (and Jesus' words especially) in Conversations, it will be worth it. Though it might have been any page of little Marcel's Conversations, today (thank you guardian angel for returning me to 10 November 1945!) it is this one:

Jesus: You, my child, you know that I always call you by the name of little flower. You, therefore, belong to the category of my little flowers, and, in fact, you are a very fragile little flower; the slightest breath of wind is enough to make you fall at my feet. That is why I dare not depart from you. Is that not to your advantage? It is precisely because of your weakness that you are, on my part, the object of a greater love and that my lips are always ready to cover you with kisses. But you are very weak, so weak that you cannot even put up with my kisses. My little flower, remember always that you must never be sad because of your weakness. And no matter how great your weakness may be, be tranquil always, believing that my love would never have the heart to separate itself from you, my little flower.

*   *   *

There, I think that should be enough for now; enough to soothe our little souls and remind us of what Jesus most wants us to know today . . . 

Let's say our prayer again, then, asking Jesus to bless our nations (especially France, but our own as well if it is another than France) through the intercession of our dear Marcel:


Lord Jesus, have compassion on France (the U.S.A., Britain, Canada, Venezuela, Poland, Ireland, Lebanon, Syria, Scotland, Japan, Belgium, South Africa, Nigeria, Nepal, Italy, China), and all of our countries.
Graciously hold them tightly in Your love
and show them much tenderness.
So ordain things that, full of love for You,
our beloved countries contribute to make You loved in all the nations on earth.
O Love of Jesus, we now promise to remain always faithful to You
and to work with a heart on fire
to spread Your reign throughout the universe. 

We ask these favors through the intercession of our little brother and sister, Marcel and Therese.
Amen.

Draw me, we will run!!!

*   *    *
I hope to write again soon. Wouldn't it be marvelous if I could muse each day for the rest of the days of the novena, here with you so we could say our prayers on time together? I don't know if my circumstances will allow that, so please do return and say our prayer from this post daily if another post doesn't follow before the 10th.

But above all, don't be discouraged if you forget! I vote that even if we forget absolutely everything, let's remember that we have nothing to be afraid of, least of all our Jesus. He loves us! He will never let us be separated from Him, so rest in His arms and pour your heart out to Him. Or simply rest. He is with you and won't let you go away, not really. 

Thank You, Jesus, for Your infinite and infinitely tender and solicitous love!